May I present: ALL the Inglorious Republican Basterds

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What a DICK…

Literally…

The movie everyone is talkin’ bout…

Now that Sarah isn’t doing anything…

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True dat…

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The REAL reason why Sarah Palin resigned…

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Now here’s what the movie SHOULD’VE really been about…

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A fond remebrance of the “King”… uh, sort-of.

By The Mad White Male

In lieu of the death of Michael Jackson I would like to pay tribute by telling my Michael Jackson story. We used to have to buy music to listen to it.

I was born in 1984.

1995: 11 years of Age.

Walking out of the Coconuts that day I knew, I just knew life had changed forever. My father was grumbling about the $42.00 he had just spent on what he thought would be just a “14.00 CD.” But this was more. A 52 page booklet. 2 cds. Never-before-seen photos. Legendary song after lengendary song. Songs which had sold 100’s of millions of times over. What I had was a key to social prominence which was sure to thrust me into the upper-echelon of junior high.

In a dramatic turn of events, only months earlier a fellow contemporary classmate had experienced his rise. Ricky, with his glasses and his braces, had commandeered a copy of the soundtrack to the R-Rated urban staple “Friday” movie starring Ice Cube and Chris Tucker; and brought it to school. Before this Ricky was known for his feminine athletic tendencies and shitting his pants in the fourth grade. Ricky ate sardines for lunch and had to wear his retainer constantly, and, at only 11 years of age; was experiencing advanced premature baldness. He also had a weight problem. Ricky was a nobody.

The lead single off the “Friday” soundtrack, “Keep They Muthafuckin’ Headz Ringin”

This was no longer the soundtrack to Friday, it was now the soundtrack to Ricky’s glorious childhood.

Brittany asked if Ricky could bring the CD over and they could both listen to it.

Sean asked Ricky to play Lazer Tag and not forget to “bring his CD” to listen to in his older brothers car.

Dan asked if he could borrow the CD and that day at lunch, straight out of the last 15-minutes of ‘Rudy’, Ricky became the only non-player to be carried off the recess field. Ricky had become a God. His balls had officially dropped, and he was in his prime.

Getting on the bus that day I knew it was in the bag, literally. When I unveiled my masterpiece to oooo’s and ahhhh’s this would be my soundtrack.

I sat down in the back in one of the larger seats on the left. Ricky was across the isle and Sean and Dan were in the seats in front of us.

“I got this Cypress Hill my older brother borrowed me,” said Dan as he flipped open his large CD player.

“What do you have?” Ricky asked Sean. “I got this new Bone-Thugs-In-Harmony”

“Cool” muttered Ricky.

“You guys are not going to believe what I’ve got!” as I reached into my turquoise Jansport.

“Michael Jackson’s new double LP, ‘HISTORY’.

The lead single from Michael Jackson’s double LP History, also the theme song to Free Willy 2, “Childhood.”

“I knew he was a fucking fagot.”

“Is that really a Michael Jackson CD?!?!”

“You white bitch.” (Dan’s dad was Mexican.)

“Guys, this is Michael Jackson: The King of Pop. Its got an extensive never-before-seen 52-page full color booklet inside. It’s 2 Cd’s, 150 minutes of pure Michael magic. The new hit smash “Childhood” is on here from the up-coming family feature ‘Free Willy 2″, its got Billie Jean on it.”

“Who the FUCK is Billie Bean?!?!” yelled Ricky.

Dan smashes the CD to the bus floor and it goes sliding.

“Are you fucking gay dude?” Sean screams in my face.

“White bitch!” Dan punches me in my stomach.

“He’s a fucking child molester, what the fuck is wrong with you?”

“This kid’s a queer.” “Yeah fuck this kid.”

Dan, Sean, and Ricky laugh as they collectively move to the front of the bus.

In class Brittany asks if I “really had a Michael Jackson CD on the bus.” She laughs at me in front of everyone.

“He’s he King of Pop, didn’t you see “The Wiz ?!?!” I yell back sweating.

“Only faggots and child molester kids who’ve been child molested listen to Michael Jackson. Are you a child child molestor?????” yelled Sean.

“Yeah, were you molested?!?!” yelled Ricky.

Ricky and Dan high five each other.

The next 3 years of my life are considered to be the worst 3 ever. I look back as if I was John McCain and that school was a prison camp. Everyday became a Michael Jackson ball touching nightmare. Every moment spent looking around corners and blacking out during swirlies.

Thanks Michael, you really touched me.

Barack Obama; the new Messiah, or just some lucky “nigger”?

Point: The Mad White Male

There’s a fucking nigger in the white house.

(If this shit doesn’t get hits I don’t know what will. By the way everyone, The Peoples Poet’s ancestry is officially riddled with SS Officer after “Camp Doctor” after SS Luftwaffe, seriously folks)

Obama should not be President not because he’s inexperienced. Just because he had never been out of the country before he was elected, or because he’s never done anything in neither the business world nor the Military arms is irrelevant. Just because his wife looks like Goro from Mortal Kombat is neither here; nor there.  His raging racist Uncle Jeremiah Wrong who he’s been intimate with for 23 years or his best friend William Aires who Obama planned out his campaign with, even if its a fact and its been proven, we sleep tight knowing our responsible unbiased Liberal Media (CBS, NBC, MSNBC, CNN, etc) will report whats right. Even if they elected him…..

Obama shouldn’t be president because he’s a negro; and negro brains are smaller than white brains. It’s widely known…

Dr. Robert Bennett Bean in the American Journal of Anatomy writes:

“The work was undertaken at the suggestion of Dr. Mall, as a result of information by Dr. Hrdlicka, of the U. S. National Museum, that racial differences exist in the Xegro brain. Dr. Hrdlicka had observed particularly that the brain of the full-blood Xegro has relatively small volume and straighter lines anteriorly to the central fissure, the sides of the Caucasian brain over the same area showing, even in dolichocephals, more mass and arching. I wish here to express my hearty appreciation for the interest Dr. Hrdlicka has displayed in my work since its inception and for his generosity in allowing me to make this study. Most of the brains studied are from the collection at the Anatomical Laboratory of the Johns Hopkins University and were placed at my disposal by Dr. Mall who has also controlled the measurements taken. ”

Dr. Bean continues:

“It is evident that the frontal lobe of the Negro brain is smaller than the frontal lobe of the Caucasian brain. This racial difference has been recognized by anatomists heretofore, but in only a few individual cases has it been emphasized. Even [the great German anatomist Friedrich] Tiedemann, that eminent continental champion of the Negro…does admit that the frontal lobes of the Negro brain are smaller than those of the European. ”

More fromt the American Journal of Anatomy:

“the anatomical basis for the complete failure of of the negro schools to impart the higher studies – the brain cannot comprehend them any more than a horse can understand the rule of three…[and] leaders in all political parties now acknowledge the error of human equality…It may be practicable to rectify the error and remove a menace to our prosperity – a large electorate without brains.

“It is generally understood that the posterior association center is objective, while the anterior association center is subjective, the one representing the powers of conception in the concrete, the other, the powers of thought in the abstract. The relative differences [between the brains of blacks and whites] is suggestive in relation to the known to the known characteristics of the two. The Caucasian is subjective, the Negro objective. The Caucasian…is dominant and domineering, and possessed primarily with determination, will power, self-control, self-government…with a high development of the ethical and aesthetic values…[whereas the] Negro is primarily affectionate, immensely emotional, then sensual and under stimulation passionate. There is love of ostentation…love of music, and capacity for melodious atriculation; there is undeveloped artistic power and taste…instability of character incident to lack of self-control, especially in connection with the sexual relation. ”

So there you have it, resounding evidence that black people are genetically and intellectually inferior to white people:
http://scienceblogs.com/neurophilosophy/2007/07/on_the_peculiarities_of_the_ne.php

So fucking what if the study was done in 1906.
Black women look like Belugas

Counterpoint: The People’s Poet

The first thing is; I debated whether to include the “N-word” in this post. I considered it long and hard,  (much like Angry Whitey considers Obama’s penis; hence his fear of him) and upon pondering the issue, I realized that being the title of this blog is of course “So Totally and COMPLETELY Politically Incorrect”, I opted for keeping it in.

The way I see it is; this is how a LOT of white people talk in the privacy of their own “cliques”, and this is how they tend to feel deep down inside. Especially REPUBLICAN panty wastes.

Now, onto the issue at hand; to BEGIN with, Michelle Obama looks NOTHING like Goro – it is both ludicrous and at the same time, undermines Angry Whiteys credibility (if he had any to begin with), by even suggesting such a CLEARLY (there’s that word again) unsubstantiated CLAIM like that.

Her hair is COMPLETELY different!

Here’s the deal; I don’t give a FLYING fuck what Obama’s qualifications are. I couldn’t care less if they found him in a cardboard box, lying around in the middle of Whacker DRIVE for Christ’s sake – his accomplishments are NOT why people voted for him. In fact, his lack of accomplishments were the VERY attraction to him; he wasn’t part of the “old BOYS” political club – THE people  wanted CHANGE, you ignorant cracker – not redundancy. His very “in-experience” is WHY most people felt he was the “Messiah”.  Speaking which, Jesus Christ himself was a fucking CARPENTER!

And for the record, Jeremiah Wright never said anything that was ALL that “wrong” to begin with. Black people have been discriminated against since our ancestors dragged them over in chains some 300 years ago – and a lot of them are still in social chains – denied the very basic social developmental skills we as WHITE people take for granted, based solely on the color of their skin.  Take a walk through ANY south side inner-city Chicago school today, and tell me THAT’S how it was for you as a child in school – and you’d be LYING through your white-bread, victim of inbreeding, ever-weakening teeth.

And lastly, quoting some crack-pot “scientists” from the early 20th century, as evidence to your completely fantastical ILLUSION that Obama is somehow not qualified, is not only preposterous, it’s completely irrelevant. Even if these scientists were somehow (Jeremiah) right, it has no bearing on today’s “negro”, not to mention that Obama is half-white, as are most African-Americans who were born in this country. (There was a lot of slave/master shenanigans going on in the late 1800’s. Just Google Thomas Jefferson/slaves for evidence of that.)

Here’s the bottome line; Obama is a GOD. He is the very essense of what ALL humans strive to be: inteligent, articulate and above all else – absolutely and completely – INSPIRING. White hicks and Republicans hate him because he is the antithesis of EVERYTHING they are; a black man, who is physically superior in EVERY way imaginable – doesn’t play by the pre-set “You scratch my back, and I’ll scratch yours” rules – and even worse; he’s just as smart as ANY of em – in fact, SMARTER.

He’s GENIUS!